So now I’m realizing that I should have used this site as a forum for rants regarding my roommate, henceforth named “Mike”. Mike is always a source of frustrating amazement. He’s in his early twenties with no real goals or aims in life. I ended up with him because the previous roommate was a nutjob. We will call him “Allen”. Allen was a friend of mine and my brother’s but we came to realize after living with him that he was having problems with the complex chemicals that make up normal brains and their subsequent activity. Instead of seratonin, I believe his brain was coarsing with Mountain Berry Blast Kool-Aid. Anyway, there were a few warning signs, including a film class project in which the conclusion involved a pistol suicide. The defining moment was when I came home and saw him in fetal position on the pool table, the phone tucked between his ear and shoulder, sobbing lightly. He had managed to break every window in the room with a pool cue and glass was everywhere.

So, this was near the end of the lease and we were to renew and needed someone to quickly take over. A friend of my brother’s suggested this guy named Mike. Apparently, he was a nice pleasant church-going fellow, which pleased me because I assumed that that meant he was grounded and had moral control. Boy, was I wrong.

More to follow, kids…

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